December 18th - Birthdays

I love birthdays.

I love parties.

I love celebrations.  

I love celebrating. 

And I love Sarah's birthday ritual.

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Today isn't my birthday, but it might be yours.

If it is, I hope you're having a wonderful day 

- a day of authentic indulgences, joyful simplicities, 

contemplation, closure, and celebration. 

We should all commemorate our birthdays that way.

I've reached a point where I'm not really big 

on major birthday gatherings, 

but I do need to distinguish the birth day of my life 

in special ways from the rest of the calendar. 

So I've created my own birthday ritual to help me commemorate 

the year just past while invoking illumination for the year to come. 

First, I take a soothing bath, symbolically washing away the past year's pain, sorrow, regrets, mistakes, and guilt. Then I go alone to my bedroom and light one votive candle for each year. (This is not as daunting as it sounds if you use the tiny "tea lights" that come in their own metal container. Gather them together on a tray or spread them around the room.) My favorite music is playing in the background, fragrant incense fills the air, and beside my bed is a bouquet of my favorite flowers. I put on a brand-new nightgown and get comfortable in my freshly made bed. Then I offer a personal psalm of thanksgiving for my life. As the candles burn I reflect on my personal journey so far. I look at old and recent photographs, then read selections from my journal. So many wonderful moments from the past year have already slipped from my conscious memory; it's comforting to call them back for a brief visit. 

Next I ask for a birthday gift that only the Giver of Good can bestow: to conceive a wonderful new dream or plan; to realize a dream delayed; to overcome an old fear or be released from an old pain; to experience a new freedom; to discover a new strength; to find a new friend; to achieve a long-sought goal; to reach toward a new aspiration; to overcome a new challenge.

I sip a glass of champagne, then slowly open a beautifully wrapped gift from my authentic self. And of course, it's the perfect present.

Many people who love you will try, but no one can celebrate your birthday exactly the way you need for it to be observed. That's because no one really knows the year you've just completed; no one else has lived it. What's more, each year is different...

Maybe you need, not a boisterous family party, but a few private hours to remember, to honor the sacredness of the profound changes that have occurred in your life. 

Birthdays are new beginnings, but they're also moments of personal closure, which are crucial if we are to grow positively into our authenticity.

Every birthday...is a significant milestone. 

Every age brings with it three hundred sixty-five Real Life lessons.

"We turn, not older with years, but newer every day,"

Emily Dickinson reassures the birthday girl in all of us.

And that's certainly something worth celebrating in grand style.

So: Happy Birthday! Happy birthday to you!

I've got a good feeling that this coming year

 is going to be your best yet.

Heaven knows you deserve it.

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My recent birthday ritual has been two fold.

One, pork verde tacos shared with friends.

Two, sushi with my best friend.

Now sushi with my best friend has happened more often this year, 

so I'm thinking we're doing tacos in February.

And I need to accumulate 28 tea candles.

Happy birthday, happy belated birthday. 

I'm very glad you were born.

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Gratitude Journal

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1) Family

2) Friends

3) Seeing my very best friend. We've been friends for well over a decade now and she lives very far away. I miss her terribly, and I'm so glad she makes time to visit me along with all the other important people in her life.

4) Leftovers

5) Restful Mondays