Update on Goals: February 12th

Monday, February 12, 2018

Keeping your goals is hard. 

Last month I felt like I was on top of the world, 
and then I realized that I still have 11 months to go,
which is comforting for the goals I'm not doing so well on
and daunting for the goals I am doing well on. 

I have a lot of goals, 11 to be exact. 
And they're not so much goals as a 
"Things that I really really want to do" list. 

So instead of telling you what I didn't do, which is a lot, 
I'm going to focus on what I did do, which is also a lot.

1) Do not touch my eyebrows. 
Check!

Before

After



They are making a comeback, that's for sure.

I'm also having nightmares about them, which sucks.
I dream that someone ties me down and plucks out every last eyebrow hair. 
I wake up scared to death that I have to start all over again. 

Dealing with my trichotillomania has not been easy.
I stroke my eyebrows a lot.
But I haven't picked at them. Not once.
It used to be picking them, but in the last few years it's turned into plucking them that has been the drive and desire. It's turned into a bit of body dysmorphia, which is all new to me. But since I've decided to love my body, every little bit of it, I'm learning to love my eyebrows too. I plucked them and picked at them till they were almost non existent because of my disorder, and then it turned into not thinking they were good enough and I had to change them. Now I have a year to grow them out and not touch them with tweezers or makeup, and learn to love them, bushy and bald spots and all. 

And you best believe January 1st 2019 I'm going to clean them up and fill them in a little with makeup. But I'll never again over pluck, because if this year is going to teach me anything, it's that they are perfect the way they are and that I am beautiful. 

Do you want to hear something kind of funny that I remembered the other day? We were on a family vacation one summer, I must have been an early teenager, and someone said to me (I can't remember if it was my mom or dad, or both) that I had to do something about my mustache and my eyebrows because they were so hairy. 

I remember going and sitting in the car, looking in the mirror, looking at my face, looking at something that I had never thought was a problem before. 

To all the women out there...your hair is not a problem. 

Now I admit, I feel better with shaved legs, arm pits, and a freshly threaded face...but you have to love yourself first and foremost, hair and all. And then go shave it off if that's what makes you more comfortable.

Does that make sense?

And don't you ever tell a little girl that she needs to do something like that. Do you know what I thought? I thought that I was ugly, a thought I don't think I had ever had before. We don't need to put on makeup, or dress up, or paint our nails, or lavish ourselves with jewelry and things...we just do those for fun and to accentuate the natural beauty that we already have. But you have to love the natural beauty first, or else all the junk we put on is what makes us beautiful, 
and that's just sad.


2) Read my scriptures and pray every day.


Yeah....I need to figure this out.


 3) Make more time for friends.



We are certainly trying! We love our friends.


4) Make Chasing Shelby something great. 
Like #3, I could be doing better.....

Well, I didn't put this together, but my mom is doing awesome!

Orange chicken was Shelby's favorite. I can't wait!



6) Do more crafts, and 7) Put things away 

Well, let me tell you how this has been going, because oh my goodness this has been where my priorities have been.

 My home has been so unorganized that I couldn't get anything done! 
So organizing the craft room was the first on the list.


Boom! Done.
Now I actually have a table to work on!!!

Putting things away is hard if things don't have a place to go.
So I've done a lot of organizing. The craft room, the medicine cabinet, the toys! We took out two black garbage bags full of toys and some other big bulky toys, and the kids rooms are so much better now! 
Jacob said "Thank you for taking the toys out." Wow.

It takes a lot of time to put things away when you have three littles who are constantly pulling things out. And trying to teach them to put things away without completely loosing my crap because I have to repeat myself a million times is very difficult. 

So that's what I've been doing.




Let me tell you a little something about priorities and goals. 
Yesterday at church we were talking about what distracts us from doing the most important things. My answer is easy and obvious: other good things. I spent my entire Saturday night and most of the day doing laundry, I spent almost two weeks organizing that craft room, and I spent a good couple hours making valentines day cards for my friends (I wanted to do a craft, and I loved it!). 

But did I read my scriptures? 
No.
Did I pray sincerely?
No.

What is most important? 

I need to figure out how to keep my priorities straight 
and not get so caught up and distracted by other good things. 

I don't really know how to do that. 

But I'm going to try.

It seems that my goals really can boil down to one goal:

Make the most important things priorities, and do them.





And PS, don't forget to make you time a priority.
 I went thrift store shopping and spent $50 on some amazing finds,
and I spent all of Saturday night and part of Sunday morning pampering and taking care of myself. 

 My first head to toe thrift store outfit. 
And I LOVE this red! I cant believe that I found a skirt the exact same color red as my lipsense! If you can't tell, this makes me super happy.


And PPS...

Another thing that was brought up on Sunday was that God is pleased when we try. We are not going to be able to do everything, and I have daily proof of that. But we can do whatever it is that we are doing and do it well, focus on it and make it something great, and at the end of the day be able to say that you had a good and successful day. 

Do not downplay what you have accomplished 
just because you have not succeeded 
in accomplishing everything.

It is a journey. 
One step at a time. 

 

Articulate

Sunday, January 21, 2018

Today in Relief Society our lesson was on Sharon Eubank's talk Turn On Your Light. Our teacher also referred us to our new prophet's talk A Plea to my Sisters. One of the ways Sharon tells us we can turn on our light is by being articulate. As we were discussing this, our dear RS President said "Ask her, she has a blog!" and I about died. Being put on the spot, I'm actually not very good at being articulate. I ramble, and have a hard time making my point. 

Well, I think I still do that in my writing too, and I spend a pretty good deal of time on that and I'm not put on the spot, so...


So I was thinking about it and I wanted to share my thoughts.
I was very grateful that someone things I'm articulate, that I'm good at expressing myself and my feelings clearly. This is how I think I got to where I am, and this is how I plan on continuing to grow more articulate. These are things that everyone can do, no matter how well or not well you think you speak.

To not be afraid or ashamed, 
and to have faith and courage.


Now this is more easily said then done, and is two fold.
In order to be brave, you must also do this.

Know yourself
Know God
Know the scriptures and the gospel
In short, be knowledgeable

But also knowing that you don't have all the answers, and that not every problem needs to be solved right now. You don't have to know everything, but you can know some things and have faith in the rest, and that is good enough. Be patient with yourself and show the same courtesy to others. No one is perfect, especially in speaking, and do you know everything? No. Only God is omnipotent, so don't worry about not knowing everything. Just keep learning.

But you have to work on it, getting to know yourself and know God every single day, or when the time comes to be brave and speak up you won't be able to.

Do not stoop to contention and anger
Learn to walk away

We need to be brave most when we are being attacked, but do not stoop to their level. Stop them right there, tell them the truth that you know, and tell them that you can still love them and disagree with them. Sometimes, they won't even let you get your words out. That's when you walk away, because their hearts are hardened and their ears shut and not one word you say is going to make a difference right then. But you walking away, not in anger, saying that you'd be more than happy to have a discussion in a civilized manner without contention, and that you still love them, that might make a difference. 
If not to them, at least it will to you.

We also need this in normal daily tasks. Not being afraid to pray in public, or talk about our Savior when you know that's what someone needs, or give someone a Book of Mormon, etc etc. 

Always speak with Love

If you're not speaking with love, you're doing it wrong.



Yes, it would be nice if we could have perfect grammar, have a great vocabulary, speak eloquently, know exactly when to pause and what to say at the perfect moment...

But for most of us it's probably not going to happen. 

So don't worry about that stuff. If you want to work on it, do it. 
But for me, right now, it's not a priority.

What is a priority, is being brave. 
Not being afraid to speak the truth, even if it's unpopular.
Continuing to learn and grow my faith and testimony.
Continuing to know myself and my God 
and learn how to become more like my Savior.
Never speaking in anger or contention and learning to walk away.
Always speaking with love.

I know, maybe this doesn't seem very conventional, 
but this is how I have learned to speak. 

I hope that it helps you as much as it has helped me 
in becoming more articulate about sharing the gospel.


Update on Goals: January 21st

I've been pretty darn awesome at my goals so far.

1) Not touching my eyebrows, doing pretty darn good. 
More than good, I'm doing awesome. Haven't touched them one bit.

A couple weeks ago


Today


2) Reading my scriptures and praying? I could work on that...

3) Make more time for friends, yes! I've seen at least one friend this last week (I'm pretty sure I've seen more, but I can't remember...I have a terrible memory), and have set up some play dates and dinner dates. Today, I introduced myself to someone I didn't know, and I then introduced her to another friend. Turns out they had already met, but now they're re-acquainted. 

4) I haven't touched Chasing Shelby......
It may just be an excuse, but I'm trying to get the rest of my life and home in order before I start this one.

5) Write my own piano lesson material, check! I'm making daily progress on. Every lesson I make notes on my students so I can be a better teacher, notes for myself and how I want my material to be different, and every night I've worked on arrangements for my students so they can start practicing fun songs as soon as possible. 
 Heck yeah, I'm gonna rock it this year.

6) Do more crafts, yeah, first I have to finish cleaning and organizing my craft room. I have this thing, the way I organize, it may be weird but here's how it goes. So I picked a spot in the craft room to start, and I chose a pile of books. We have so many books, and I want to get through all of them instead of reading the same one over and over, so I'd been stacking books that we'd read in my craft room so the kids couldn't mix them in with the other books. Well, books don't go in the craft room, do they. So I went and organized the bookshelf and went through all the books so that I could then move the books out of my craft room...

So that's how that's been going. 
But I've been taking my time, making sure I'm not just in there to get it done and neglecting more important things.

7) Putting things away after I take them out. I'm doing good! I was running late to church so most of my bathroom stuff is still on the counter, but I'll get to that before I go to bed when I go wash up.

8) Exercise. Well, I'm planning on it this week. Wish me luck!

9) Riding the waves of depression I did pretty darn good. I was able to be sick and useless and I came out of it my normal happy self instead of depressed. Gold star.

10) Start re-learning physical therapy, yeah, that hasn't happened yet. I'm reading The Hobbit. Then I'll read Lord of the Rings...then I'll add some physical therapy in there...maybe....I might just take this goal out until next year.

11) Revamp old blogs...haven't touched them. 
But I am blogging today, so there's that.


How are your goals going?
Have you written them down? It's not too late! 
It's never too late to set a goal.

Here's another one I'm excited about, it mixes friends and crafts.
I'm starting a crocheting/craft club. 
We're going to meet once a month.
I'm so excited.
 

 

So, what are you doing that's making you dance for joy?!!?
 
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