January 4th - "Life's not a dress rehearsal"

Wednesday, January 4, 2017

Sarah starts off today quoting Agnes De Mille.

"When you perform...you are out of yourself - larger and more potent, more beautiful. You are for minutes heroic. This is power. This is glory on earth. And it is yours, nightly."

I love performing. Fortunately, or unfortunately, I went to a high school where everyone was musically, dramatically, and academically talented. It was amazing because I was constantly surrounded by the arts, and I grew to love them passionately. But as many of you know, not all of us bloom in high school. I was very awkward (or at least I felt like it), and because I was never the best at anything my confidence waned. 

Even with my confidence lacking, I never stopped wanting to be in the spot light...to dress up, to be special, heroic, beautiful...

But then you have kids...3 kids in the space of 2 years...and then you get depressed...And it's hard to get out of the house or not smell like poop or spit up so you just choose not to go anywhere and if you're not going anywhere why get dressed? Or shower every day. Or do your nails...Especially when it takes so much valuable time, time you don't feel like you have. But the problem with that is then that becomes your norm and then you just sink deeper and deeper into "why bother?" and it gets harder and harder to dig yourself out. This is not good for people living with depression, let me tell you. 

When I first read this day a couple years ago it seriously helped change my life. I have a beautiful cousin, who has two beautiful babies with a third on the way and she is a firm believer in getting dressed and looking amazing every day. I remember reading her blog and thinking "how in the world does she do it?" when I feel like I can't even begin to try...

But when I read this, "life's not a dress rehearsal", something resonated in me. I remember dress rehearsals, I remember holding back to save something for opening night. Sarah said "if we're not playing to an audience, does it really matter?" 


Yes it does matter! I can feel it in my bones that it does matter. When I practice a piece of music I don't just half a$$ it, I practice it like my life depends on it, like I am performing for someone...because I am performing for someone. I'm performing for myself. This is my life, this life that I'm living is my art and it does matter. 

Sarah wrote "it does take more effort...but it enhances our enjoyment." And it does, it takes A LOT of effort...but we act differently when we dress things up...we act better, we feel better, we are better. Where is the downside?

Now I'm not saying get dressed up every day... I had a pajama day today; we watched movies, cleaned up the house a little, listened to the rain, took naps and cuddled together. A real, amazing, pajama day. Just watch that slippery slope and make sure when you have a pajama day that you have a pajama day, and not a pajama week, or month...

Unless you're sick. All bets are off if you're sick.

This made me think of how our bodies are temples. Do we just let the temples get dirty and worn down because we're too busy? Or too tired to take care of them? What temple do you know of that isn't made to be absolutely stunning?

"For the temple of God is holy, which temple ye are." - NT

"Cast yourself as the leading lady in your own life." - SBB

I am amazing, and when I make an effort I feel it.